Two-s Day: Two Perspectives - One situation

Subject: Dear Diary

DOG'S DIARY ENTRIES...
8:00 am Dog food!
My favorite thing!
9:30 am A car ride!
My favorite thing!
9:40 am A walk in the park!
My favorite thing!
10:30 am Got rubbed and petted!
My favorite thing!
12:00 pm Lunch!
My favorite thing!
1:00 pm Played in the yard!
My favorite thing!
3:00 pm Wagged my tail!
My favorite thing!
5:00 pm Milk bones!
My favorite thing!
7:00 pm Got to play ball!
My favorite thing!
8:00 pm Wow! Watched TV with my master!
My favorite thing!
11:00 pm Sleeping on the bed!
My favorite thing!

Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary: Day 683 of my captivity:

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the floor. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. The audacity! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released --and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded! The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. The captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe....... for now....